Lanza Ironman 2017: Fun in the sun

Ironman is never easy, just the raw facts explain it: 3.8km sea swim, 180km bike, full marathon to finish. Add to this the Lanza effect -  a raw volcanic island, devoid of vegetation, hot saharan winds, no shade, black volcanic roads weaving their way though the hills, 2,500m of climbing on the bike and thats why Lanza is regarded as one of the hardest races in the world.

And thats why we are drawn back here time and time again - everyone who has ever raced any ironman has had to earn their stripes - no ironman races are easy - here though, its more than a race - its an epic epic adventure, an adventure that takes you on literally just about every road on the island on the bike route before depositing you back in the mad mad ironman bubble of Puerto Del Carmen for the run.

Lanza was my first ironman in 2015, and yesterday I return here again for my fifth. I will always be drawn back here, drawn here to witness the destruction and mayhem that Lanza inflicts as we all suffer together. Yesterdays destruction was caused by the heat - so savage, so relentless.

Lanza Ironman starts with a mass swim start - this now defines Lanza, its one of the few races left where you all pile in the water together, 1,700 athletes into the water in the space of a few seconds. I'm not a terribly strong swimmer but you simply can't beat a good bunfight with 1,700 people at 7am. I took a while to settle into a rhythm, always finding bodies in my way, and every time I paused for a second to look for a path to clearer water then the five people immediately behind me pile into me. But settle I eventually did, doing the first lap in 40 minutes. The second lap started much better, swimming on the racing line, nice and smooth and settled until we turned at the far end and within seconds found ourselves 50 metres off course - a strong cross current had developed - strong enough that some of the weaker swimmers later on couldn't get back on course at all and were pushed onto the rocky seashore - this no doubt added a few minutes to my time but once again I posted a 40 minute lap, so total swim time of 1:20 which was within a couple of minutes of where I felt I would be and a great improvement from 1:35 back in 2015.

The bike, well, it was lovely really, one of my most enjoyable rides ever. Most people loath the bike leg here but to me it all adds to the drama. I set out pace to a ride of 7 hours and rode 7:02, very happy with that and 15 minutes quicker than in 2015. For me though the bike is actually all about the run - I could have ridden a 6 hour pace but that would have fried my legs. This race I really wanted to have a good run - I find distance running "challenging" to say the least, the marathon having fallen apart at each of the previous four ironman races. I had higher hopes coming into this race - until I got off the bike and the thermometer read 32 degrees - added to this the heat being reflected off of the pavement and the lack of wind and it was simply a cauldron, the pavement temperature must have been nearly 40 degrees - destruction was evident all around me, most people we already walking -  every single one of my friends here walked at least half if not all the marathon. My saving grace I think was running every day on holiday in Cayman a few weeks ago, my body clearly a little more acclimatised to the heat - but even then it was proper slow, really just jogging along necking pints and pints of water that were immediately sweated out. My spirits improved after a couple of hours when the afternoon turned to evening and it cooled down a bit but by then the damage was done, the run becoming a run-walk which in turn then became a walk for the last 3km. I set myself the mini target of running across the finish line but failed in that too - I could have walked for hours more but my running legs were done. It was still however my best ever run at 4:45, some 20 minutes quicker than two years ago.

Weird thoughts go through your head when you are suffering - this races thoughts were "who the feck invented Ironman, this is really truly horrible..." and "holy crap my next race "The Brutal" (Ironman distance but really stupidly hilly) in September is going to be hard...."

Its difficult sometimes to get too thrilled for yourself when you see everyone around you falling a long long way short of their own hopes and desires, but that's Lanza for you, it sucks you in, chews you up and spits you out as a broken mess. But privately thrilled I was, my finish time of 13:24 some 50 minutes quicker than two years ago, my finishing place of 780th some 200 places higher. I now have finally achieved my aspiration - I am finally truly average.....

A huge thankyou to the supporters here - they were awesome - they define Lanza too, just amazing. And a thankyou too for the barman who gave me my final defining memory of the day, as I wandered slowly home he came running out of the bar and shouted "Hey Ironman, come back, free beer on the house". Love Ironman. Love Lanza.